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Description
This is my first posted song. I've never really done anything like it. Its very simple. Please let me know what you think.
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Lyrics
sweet agony, sweet pain
sweet suffering, hello again
you're my old friend
i know you so well
and when we speak
you put me through hell
i'm bleeding inside
black and gray emptiness
i'm bleeding outside
empty tears i shed
you drag me down
goodbye for now
sweet suffering, hello again
you're my old friend
i know you so well
and when we speak
you put me through hell
i'm bleeding inside
black and gray emptiness
i'm bleeding outside
empty tears i shed
you drag me down
goodbye for now




















charliechen
You had a ball putting this together, didn't you. Despite the lyrics and theme, I heard the joy contained in the effort. As depression as they are, I quite liked the lyrics. I like depressing.
I did find the instrument choices and final mix off, however. There is a tinny sound to the product which goes against the heaviness of the lyrics. It sounded like tracks and sounds produced by a Radio Shack keyboard, unfortunately.
Some suggestions:
1. Use a more rock sounding drum track/loop from GB2.
2. Turn the staccato synth sounds right from the beginning into longer notes.
3. Support the whole thing with a bass line.
I liked your vocal recording work.
Keep having fun. And I look forward to your future posts.