then don't quit, because the one thing you seem to do naturally is
capture an emotion, and that is maybe the most important ingredient,
your guitar sounds fine, your voice is very good... song structure would
be an area to work on, this kind of song wants a bridge, some kind of
break for the ears, and a chance to approach the subject matter from
the opposite direction

good work

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Thanks, I enjoy it so I'll keep working on it.

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Well, if this is your first attempt, it's really good - your voice has a
wonderful richness to it. The recording sounds great - the guitar is really
crisp, and the strings add a nice backing.

There are lots of good parts to this, but it needs a more defined structure
- the start is great, but it feels a bit unfocused as the song progresses.
The start and end, with the spoken part, really work - it needs more work
on the main body of the song (although i tend to be very structured in
terms of verse/ chorus - you need to do what feels right for the song)

This'll be a great song with a bit more work.

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Thanks
I will keep working on structure. I felt that the weakness of the song is that it
didn't have a break. I'll just have to search for one.

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Others have commented about the song writing, so I'll limit myself to
the production.

One. Does your bass player know any other rhythms? This is way too
mononononotonous. Also, it's essentially the same rhythm as what the
rhythm guitar is playing. Maybe this is my particular peeve, but I like
some rhythmic independence in parts.

Two. You have a violin or something coming in. Great; variety is always
good. But play it up. Spend some time in coming up with an actual line,
rather than just playing chord notes, and then play it loud and proud.
This is too timid.

But on the whole not bad.

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Thanks for the advice.
Actually I performed the Bass on a keyboard and I am not a bass player. I was just following the guitar parts but now I will work harder on other parts. If anyone is interested in helping with bass parts I would welcome the input.

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For a debut song this sounds very well-produced.

Your voice has a clear timbre and your efficient recording caught its
richness and subtleties. The guitars are crisp, something which i have
had a hard time achieving in most of my recordings. Your recording and
mixing technique is way ahead of the freshman curve for sure.

Above all, the song composition has an engaging melody. You put in
enough harmonies and instrumental touches to make it sound unique. It
sounds simple yet well-constructed and complete to my ears.

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Thanks for he encourging words. Alot of time was spent on finding a sound that
I was happy with, but I can see that this is a learning process. I have taken some
of the input that was given already and I will rework the song with a bridge.
Thanks again for the feedback it all helps.



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Just wanted to add that you have a great voice and that the vocal recording is topnotch. I hope there's a lot more to come in the near future.
Walter

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Thanks for the kind words and I look forward to posting more of my work. I am
taking all the comments that I have received and I hope to put them to good
use.

Ed

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I like it very much, big up for this first balad... Bravo

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