i really like the hi hat effect you have, it mixes with the drums nicely!
really cool song.

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Nice guitar playing, it provides a nice foundation for when the rest of
the song picks up. Good solid work.

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Thanks, Silence04. I have some things to flatten out, but overall I like the
mood as well. Thanks also, BranDaMan. I wish the bass would come out a
little more; it's a carrying element.

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Thanks, Silence04. I have some things to flatten out, but overall I like the
mood as well. Thanks also, BranDaMan. I wish the bass would come out a
little more; it's a carrying element.

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This reminds me of the way of life here in D.C. So many people living in there million dollar McMansions, driving their shiny new cars (always in a hurry, too), and using their bodies as bulletin boards. Of course, their children rarely see them. They are sitting at home being manipulated by the commercials on television. Anyway, I will stoop there and get to the music...

Your message one I certainly agree with (if I understand correctly), and you have relayed it poignantly. The beginning has a nice vocal 'hook'. The music bed is crisp and I like the beeps, they serve as a wake-up call. A very enjoyable track:)

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Wow, thanks a lot, K.I.S.KISMET. It surprised me how much you read in it... And
it's pretty much on the spot of what I tried to convey, even though it wasn't all
concsiously selected. In most writing related situations I try expressing myself
accurately, and I discovered that with song writing, you can keep a lot of things
open. It's an overall mood you've got to find, to hit a nerve.

---
http://www.corebasis.com/puredish

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I think you have a really strong vision in this song. Its very cohesive
with a good groove. I dig the guitar. I can't tell if it is tightly mixed with
a bass, processed, or actually a distorted bass-guitar. Some of the
effects are very subtle, like the toms that pan left to right and the quiet
tones that support the chords. It all contributes to a wonderful timbre
throughout the piece.

The lyrics are great. An anti-establishment hymn for the victims of
capitalism (which is just about everyone to some extent).

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Very useful feedback, thank you. It's interesting after you spent so much time
mastering a song, you have somebody else telling you what they hear, and it
gives you new insights.

I first feared the three verses wouldn't be enough to make a decent song, so
it's good it all keeps together and the message transmits well.

It was actually one distorted guitar with heavy equalizing, cutting out the
upper frequencies almost entirely to make it sound dull, yet dirty. Then
there's a bass line that just plays in well with the guitar, so in some passages
it sounds like one carpet of music. I guess that, and the long square synth
make the song flow forward.

I'm a sucker for good bass lines and usually take care in making a bass sound
really like a bass, even if all of this was played on a keyboard. It's strange, I
don't play guitar, but I know how it's supposed to sound.

---
http://www.corebasis.com/puredish

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Reminds me of a band from France, Kat Onoma, which should be read as
a positive thing. You have a great beat going here, great vocals, and
lyrics. The bass pump on very tight, with very clever guitars. I love it when
I find something on here and get a really huge surprice! This one is!
Thanks! /M

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hehehe....no need to raise your voice! (the larger type fills up my
powerbook screen) Cool song, and thanks for pointing it out! There are
certainly some cranky sorts that think the forum is a bad place to
promote your songs, but like you I figure it's just another use of the
forum, and new topics always intrigue me to click on them and go to
new places. Don't worry about some negative nellies, and politely post
away, that's my opinion anyway, for what it's worth. I think the best
way to get your songs noticed is to network on MJ as much as you find
possible, be a positive MJ presence, and keep submitting good songs
like this.

I really like the guitar and bass line, very hooky! I think I would prefer
less reverb on the vocal, especially since it's more spoken than sung,
and so I would like it drier and upfront more, but that's just me. The
message would be more in-your-face that way. Great lyrics, BTW. I
probably need to listen to this on better speakers though, it's really
well done!


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Thanks for the words, mikkinylund and Jim Bouchard. This is the type
of comments I was looking for.

I was uncertain with this song... I'm still in doubt if I should move it
further and perhaps put it on a demo CD or something.

As for the bigger font... I was experimenting with what you can do,
style wise, in the forum. I feel that generally the fonts used on Macjams
are tiny. I have to get closer to the screen, or increase the overall font
resolution in the browser.

I guess if they wouldn't use pixel sizes in their style sheets but relative
sizes, the resolution of fonts would depend on the client (users) side.
Because we all have different screen resolutions. I am on an iMac, for
an example, with a 2800 wide screen.

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Definitely the coolest thing you've shared with us at MJ. I really dig the
build up, the electronic sounds, the hipness. The groove, once you settle
in, is almost too normal for me, after the sci-fi build up, but I really like
the chorus, the way it sounds like a bridge. The vocals, which have a
perfect edge in my headphones, are kind of metallic harsh in my room
speakers, and I would never be able to understand the words without the
printed version, which is partly my own limitations. I dig the sci fi feel; my
ears wanted more variations by the end, perhaps the final verse
employing a drop-out of some layers to highlight "live the way you want."
I really appreciated you crafting this so well.

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Thanks a lot, Tobin, your comment really made me smile. You have a perfect
way of being helpful and summing up a feel you got from a song.<br /><br />
What you're saying makes sense actually. I had been exhausted when working
out the final details of this song. I know it needs more variation. This is
generally true for all my tracks; I tend to want to make them perfect, and get too
much lost over it. I feel, sometimes I loose touch with what I wanted to express
initially.<br /><br />
Comments like yours keep helping me grow as a musician. It's the heart and the
core of why I come back to Macjams, because you guys really listen and care for
exchange. I appreciate this passion, and I share it.

---
http://www.corebasis.com/puredish

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... I also realize I should invest in some decent monitor speakers. The only
way I can listen to songs through speakers is my stereo, and that's not
really a calibrated reference.


When I'm writing tracks, I use Sennheiser headphones, but they too are
limited in getting the full scale of frequencies.

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I love the beepy, synthetic touches and overall feel of the music. Really cool mix. I think it's perfectly fine to promote your stuff in the forums, especially when one of your tunes could use some feedback. Anyway, this was very enjoyable, thanks!

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.. I was a tad worried from the start it might get repetitive and I'd lose
interest ..but I didn't - the small variations keep you hooked and
wondering what is going to happen next. I also like that (what I
thought was a bass guitar, played high up, distorted a bit and with
finger-pinched chords/pull offs?) mixed to blend with the lovely
slappy, gutsy bass ..

the only thing that struck me as odd was the 'make not' a ton of money
.. instead of 'not make' but I guess this was a anti-download 'key' lyric
swap??

I think the singing can come up a tiny bit in the verses .. or bring down
the lead bass ..oh btw, is it "Almost got you believin' that carp" .. er
crap ..? or it is "Almost got you, believe that crap"?

... it is also ok to make lots of money and send it to me ;o) lol

It reminded me a bit of the Beatnix? and "Television, drug of the
nation, breeding ignorance and spreading radiation" .. know the one?
Might just be the over all bass sound and leading nature of the bass.

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What a good job you've done on the production on this! The drums are
as crisp as they could be, with lots of punch - agree with you about the
bass - maybe some shelving or different compression would help?
Really strong lyrics - I suspect this could have been a bit shorter (for
the genre), but it's very good as it is really.
I think with forum posts it's a matter of not abusing the pimping
capabilities - your forum post drew me to this song which I would have
otherwise missed. To me that was a good thing. I'll pay more
attention to your song posts in future.
Neil
Neil

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I like the song and especially the chord changes in the chorus. On the
down side the repetition doesn't enhance the song for me, but I did
like the ending. Your voice sounded a little like Moby, which I don't see
as a bad thing, although some might.

Very good song overall.

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...to get the word out about a song like this...

I love this song through and through. Love the opening, and love the
lyrics. The distorted bass or bass-with-guitar is a cool uniting element
with just enough rasp on my speakers to have an interesting texture
without crossing that line to annoying. And I like your vocal very much.

Gratefully downloaded.

Ed

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Wow, what a surprise when I checked in this morning. Thanks for all these
encouraging comments. It's really helpful, because my production set is
somehow limited. I have the steady feeling of knowing how something is
supposed to sound, but it's hard to get there with a decent reference (like
good speakers). I use headphones for everything.


Again, thanks for these comments. A lot of what you wrote, I was thinking
before, but it's good to have second ears listening and pointing out those
issues.

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