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NoDerivs-NonCommercial
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Description:
Ever stare at a tv thats not on or when the power goes out. originally there were two more verses but since it is a slow song i could'nt wait for a commercial break.
Lyrics:
gray porcelian man holds out his hand
so cracked so chipped he'll dissolve to sand
woman like a tree soon to lose her leaves
she'll be dormant until next spring
chorus
i will see through my broken tv
the life that is life that could be
i will see through my broken tv
there are things i never can see
in a chapel a couple to be wed
i do promise the couple had pledged
sadly the marriage had become tense
only to be divorced in Las Vegas
chorus
i will see through my broken tv
the life that is life that could be
i will see through my broken tv
there are things i never can see
Hardware:
e mac, m-audio interface, ibanez ew and ovation celebrity acoustics, ibanez sa electric, ibanez bass, m-audio keyboard, mk-219 mike, digitech gnx2.
Software:
logic express
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trebly &mdash 10/20/06 - 10:46:13 AM
Nice slow song, but a bit lacking in the bass and punch department. Everything was in the upper ranges and sounded a bit watery. Good lyrics though. I suggest boosting the bass. [ Reply to This ]
more bass &mdash 10/20/06 - 08:44:35 PM
point taken with something in the low end. the drum loop didn't have any
bottom to it and couldn't find one to fit. i'm thinking maybe a bottom feeder
synth to fill. i'll have to experiment. thanks for the listen! [ Reply to This ]
Nice and moody &mdash 10/20/06 - 12:13:16 PM
I especially love the chorus. You should do an "extended mix" and put the
additional two verses in (I'm a fan of long songs.) Great guitar work. My
only real suggestion is, like smokey said, it could use some thickening up
in the bass and the drums, but that's it. An excellent tune. Really enjoyed
it. [ Reply to This ]
but that means more singing! &mdash 10/20/06 - 08:52:02 PM
originally it was 5:30 minutes. i cut it down to a few seconds over 4. thought it
would be more radio friendly so to speak. but it does get me to thinking by
adding those additional verses and use different insturmentation on each verse
section might keep it interesting. but for now i still have 3 tunes in the works as
is. but it' s worth considering down the line.
Vic [ Reply to This ]
Nice comp! &mdash 10/20/06 - 12:18:05 PM
you know how it is &mdash 10/20/06 - 08:56:13 PM
the tv's got no picture or sound so you stare it and play out what it should be.
besides thats the only way you could make a black and white tv have color!.
Thanks for the listen and comments!
Vic [ Reply to This ]
Man that's cool ! &mdash 10/20/06 - 01:12:54 PM
Listened 3 times now - like it more and more !
Downloaded and voted 9-9-8-9.
[ Reply to This ]
funny you should say that &mdash 10/20/06 - 09:06:44 PM
i originally never intended to post this. until a friend of mine who recently had
brain surgery to remove a tumor and lost his sight. i gave him a cd that had a
collection of recent songs that i finished and was working on. after a couple of
weeks he said that he kept coming back to this song. i gave it another listen
and rethougth about made some changes. as always this will probably evolve
more. i guess a lot of songs are or always will be in progress. if theres i thing
i've learned....trust a blind man.
Vic [ Reply to This ]
yes... &mdash 10/21/06 - 12:54:11 AM
the blind man knows.... Stevie and Ray will attest to that fact too.
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"If you steer clear of quality, you're alright" -P. Townsend [ Reply to This ]
now he wants to play drums again &mdash 10/21/06 - 12:20:16 PM
he use to drum in our old days band. you'ld swear he was the son of keith
moon. i'm hoping he keeps his promise. i'll just have to make sure he's facing
the right way. don't worry he makes jokes about himself. [ Reply to This ]
Throughout it has... &mdash 10/20/06 - 02:06:45 PM
..nice vocal effect, and i love the beat and tempo change. Good work [ Reply to This ]
didn't do much to vocals &mdash 10/20/06 - 09:13:29 PM
a little stereo spread and double up the chorus. just a good raspy voice that
morning. i always like the differences of the quite parts to the heavier beats a
little drama i hope.
Thanks for the listen!
Vic [ Reply to This ]
Ha! &mdash 10/21/06 - 12:51:40 AM
My TV just died tonight! It is so fresh that the smell of burnt capacitors is
still lingering in the air as I write this. I love the cool space sounds in this
track. The guitar is nice and crisp in the mix. Very nice! All hail the
broken TV!!!! [ Reply to This ]
mmmm burnt capacitors &mdash 10/21/06 - 12:22:53 PM
sorry for you recently departed. now you got a excuse for a monsterous wide
screen! Thanks Matt. [ Reply to This ]
I really like the song as a song... &mdash 10/21/06 - 11:23:38 AM
...and I always enjoy your guitar playing. I think you are working very
similar phasing things in similar ranges with the vocals and the guitars,
leaving the whole mix kind of upper-midrangey. I don't think the
solution is just BOOSTING the bass, but more one of finding an
arrangement of instruments that puts something INTO the bass, so
there's something there...and maybe something to bust up the
similarity of voice and guitar... Where you're going with this reminds
me of Bowie's 'Man Who Sold The World' a bit...On this site, I might
also suggest listening to Petergreenstone, who also tends to filter and
flange with voice and guitar to good effect... If you end up going for
another take, I'd also suggest that the drum pattern changes, or the
playing over them, could be tighter... And of course, to reiterate, I'm
putting out this seeming stack of crit because, at bottom, I really like
the song...
Ed [ Reply to This ]
very much appreciated ed &mdash 10/21/06 - 12:45:56 PM
you made the points i needed to hear. i was going to redo the drums on the
keyboard ( this loop was about all i could come close to finding) but i deleted
unused tracks and when i could bring a insturment track back up i could'nt get
the drum sounds. argh! thinking about it now, theres 3 or 4 acoustics that i
should of played at different postions to broaden the field maybe that could
seperate my voice out. and yes peter is a fav, wish we could hear more, its been
a while. i consider my self a novice at recording and mixing, everytime i learn
something new i tend to revive previous songs, its a wonder i get any new ones
done. thanks ed, be brutal, i can take it, jsut don't leave any visable scars!
Vic [ Reply to This ]
Excellent Song &mdash 10/21/06 - 12:23:56 PM
I especially enjoy the melody and your guitar work.
The lyrical imagery is very striking in the first verse and sad, but elatively
mundane, in the second. It's an interesting contrast and I'd be curious to
hear a longer version with additional verses. [ Reply to This ]
elatively? &mdash 10/21/06 - 12:26:03 PM
this site could use spell check &mdash 10/21/06 - 01:00:33 PM
that means i'ld have to sing more.. &mdash 10/21/06 - 12:58:10 PM
probably down the line i'm sure i'll rework on this, i wasn't expecting anybody to
really want to hear more of this song. i have 3 in the works i want to finish off
first. whether they get posted or not remains to be seen. i'll have to review my
notes, if i remmeber right some of the other verses where of a more abstract
poetry. everyones kind of opened my eyes to this song. [ Reply to This ]
Original... &mdash 10/22/06 - 04:27:40 PM
...and creative. Lots's of interesting changes. Guitars sound great, in all
their varying tones, played very well. I think the vocals could have been
louder, but maybe that's my set up. Love the broken tv concept. Great
lyrics built on it too. [ Reply to This ]
now it's onto.. &mdash 10/22/06 - 06:47:15 PM
broken ham radios, warrbly cassette decks. thanks for the appreciation. it had
other elements but i edited it down. after all the great response and suggestions
i might do a total rehaul, and if i could just squeeze one more guitar solo in. ah,
better not push it.
Thanks!
Vic [ Reply to This ]
Hey! Nice work... &mdash 10/24/06 - 04:06:28 PM
...there Vicar! I'm never disappointed by your postings. Interesting
lyrics...nice spacey music...lovely lead riffing...cool change-ups. Color me
satisfied!
Be well! [ Reply to This ]
looks like santa's been by! &mdash 10/24/06 - 08:55:23 PM
totally unexpected for dropping by (at this time) and left a nice present, i mean
the comment of course. the marshall half stack latter? thank you santa, i have
tried to be a good boy this year! take care bud! [ Reply to This ]
! &mdash 11/02/06 - 01:20:14 AM
surprising transistion to the chorus. The short measure was a good touch. I like that.
The distorted stepper synth is a cool sound that fits well with the vocals, but I feel like the level might be a little high. Just a feeling.
I like the simplicity of the vocals with respect to the rather complicated or abstract (I'm not sure which I mean at the moment) tonal movements in the song.
Sweet guitar work, too.
Cool tune.
g [ Reply to This ]
probably abstract &mdash 11/02/06 - 10:05:44 PM
i like to keep people guessing sometimes. synths can do strange things when you convert to mp3, bottom drops out and somethings get higher, kind of sucks.
Thanks for the comment. [ Reply to This ]
Good song &mdash 11/13/06 - 11:56:44 AM
I really do like this song, so any criticism comes from wanting to do right by a song I've come to care about.
I agree with the folks who want a bit more beef in the arrangement and I think one way to get that might be to replace the electro/acoustic piezo guitar arpeggios with a conventional electric guitar, dialed up with a nice, meaty tone. Or, just double the electro/acoustic with the Ibanez sa. Heck, while you're at it, you could add a track of acoustic guitar, but this time mic it up and ignore the transducer pickup- go all old sk00l on it!
Did you play bass guitar on this one?
Anyways, great song, thanks! [ Reply to This ]
thanks a song is never finished &mdash 11/13/06 - 04:04:09 PM
some changes have been made. multiband helped alot there. but when i can get around to it there are other changes i will probably make as well. unfortunatly thsi site doesn't let you just replace the song as it exists, with comments and ratings intacted. you have to totally repost it. so i just let it stand without reposting it and driving everyone nuts, though i have done that once. liked your ideas. thanks [ Reply to This ]
Doin some catching up &mdash 11/21/06 - 10:00:29 PM
I've been kind of busy and wanted to catch up with some of the things I might have missed here on MJ.
This song is one of the things I am sorry I missed before but I am glad I caught up with it. There are some good suggestions above but I like the overall feel of this song. There is something really engaging about it. DO NOT CHANGE A THING ABOUT THE LEAD GUITAR SOLO SOUND. It is perfect. I love that really thin sound on this song. I cannot wait until you post a revised version of it. BTW I also agree that you might want to extend the solo guitar part. [ Reply to This ]
its hard to keep up &mdash 11/22/06 - 03:46:39 PM
i know what your talking about, i try to go back listen to older stuff when i can. have made some changes, but just haven't had the time to really go back in...yet, reposting? never really get around to that even on other songs listed here. unfortunatly you just can't slip them back in. [ Reply to This ]
tv &mdash 11/23/06 - 10:24:04 AM
wierd changes A littleoff in some places but I like things that way my favorite part is the lead. Im going to make it a point to scroll through all your songs [ Reply to This ]
we like wierd! &mdash 11/23/06 - 12:51:56 PM
Great guitar &mdash 12/26/06 - 01:23:06 AM
I use to live for guitar solos. Your guitar playing just comes together so nice. The blend of acoustic and ripping electric is put together very cool. Floyd-ish at times near the end.
Enjoyed this tremendously.
Keep jammin
downed and poded
T [ Reply to This ]
thanks timothy &mdash 12/26/06 - 09:56:56 PM
i'm honored your going through this mess! you've probably realized by now i like to orchestrate guitars, someday i plan to get all 12 in on song. ha! that will more then just broken tv. [ Reply to This ]
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