"I want to rock out the final phrase but then perhaps that
would be a bit jilting considering the rest of the peace."
i think if you suddenly brought in some thick, distorted
Ibanez RG sweetness it could be very awesome. right now
it's very sleepy.
good vocals though - but push them more. i've been
given the same advice... passing it on...
guitar picking sounds lovely

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It is very sleepy...that's been the charcter flaw(if I may) of this tune. There are elements I really enjoy but also there doesn't seem to be enough to drive you home. we'll see...thanks for your input!

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There's a lack of intensity or urgency in the arrangement.
Sure sounds clean tho.

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I like this song. I like the thin-ness. I like the reverse-echo
(?) vocals. I like the melody. I love the chord changes.
Inventive, restrained, soft.

This is a pillow of somber joys. I lay down on it and I feel
perfectly comfortable. The ending is perfect. Backwards
guitar... keyboard... the voice is best at the end.

This is a cool song.

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Hey Fosod, thanks for the kiss! Who, by the weigh, IS Layne Staley? Very curious! Love Farmer Dude! ---M of handovergold

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=dead lead singer of Alice in Chains. He was sweet. Once upon a heroin time.

---
Kind regards,

Fosod
--
Fosod Design Studios
www.fosod.com

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crap.
i just hit reply and the song stopped. damnit!

anyway... wanted to say... don't really see the layne reference but... if that
man were still alive i'd have his babies...

---
a permanent smile with your well worn frown

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I really liked the free form of this song. Many people
would let it rock out at the end. I think it would lose the
asthetic and feel of the song. Great lyrics also. I love the
marriage of the melody to the lyrics

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thanks for hte notes on diads and triads...and doodads.

i know how to play basic guitar...i only had this keyboard
a few months. i just sorta feel my way around when i play.

i uploaded another keyboard piece that i think might
sound more 'together' than the last one.
your input would be appreciated.

i like this song you got here.
pleasant groove and good vocals.
: )
it's beautiful and cohesive.

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that melody. The vocals take you in unexpected, delicious
directions... Breathy lead, with perfect guitar setting the
mood. Hauntingly beautiful...

So here's the votes: 2,3,2,1

;)

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Hah!--Veddy sceddy! What?! No ZEROS? Thanks, really!

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Actually, I couldn't help deciding I had to hear it again, and came back to see
you already replied (!) Get some sleep! Anyway, my actual votes were 8-8
-9-8, or at least that's what it says I voted... Maybe *I* need to get some
sleep. If you've followed any of my threads in some of the forums, you won't
be surprised that I voted before knowing what the ratings were or what the
comments were... So having just now read the other comments, I have to
urge you NOT to do anything about this song's supposed "sleepiness". It's
perfect. It takes you into a quieter darker more somber place, but sleepy??
Nah. I love the way the melody lilts up on words like "breath". That totally
caught my attention and made me anything but sleepy. On second listen, I
love the way the guitar starts out sounding sort of standard in its
progression, but even by the time you get to the bass, you can hear this song
is going someplace new. My limited talent can't hear the room for
improvement there.

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I'm probably going to set records for posting comments to this song...

Anyway, I've downloaded this song and probably listened to at least 20 times.
Quite unexpectedly, this song has become my favorite of ANYTHING I've
heard here to date. (!!!)

Having heard it a score of times now, I have 1 question or comment. The
word "today" after ungrateful sounds like it is carried off tune (sharp). Is that
intentional? I can't quite make my mind if I like it or it bothers me...

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Yes, there is some intentional skewing of tuning in that note,---I don't know why-but it stuck out and for some reason I left in in-God knows I didn't have to--but then I don't have as much time to fine tune as I would like. I guess b/c of the warped time idea in general, I wanted to convey this time warping as well as some tonal warping to sort of carry the listener in a dream-like way--hence the vocal treatment as well. I sort of try to create a character with the music that Jeremy makes, as well as my own compositions. He is just far more proflific than I in creating the soundscapes that inspire me. You are right to challenge this aspect, and I am glad that you noticed. I feel like I have been heard! The Tomorrow One was written originally about a super race of aliens that inhabit the future, and yet some of us lowly earthlings can sense the time traveling that happens---almost like they are angels visiting--and then I took it up again when Jeff Buckley's(sp?)pothumous Chicago Metro Show was aired on JBTV one night this spring while listening to this track that Jeremy did....I really feel that Buckley would've been like a Tomorrow One....heck..maybe Jeremy is a Tomorrow One....;)

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Don't forget to fill out the ID tag info on your MP3s so that
when it gets downloaded it includes the artist and has a
better title than "Track 7"! LOL

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on the guitar....wonderful vocals....very tight and airy.....

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