MacJams.com - Song: First Train For Home by sschedra

First Train For Home by sschedra [Email]

Genre: Country-Western

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Description:

Well, sigh! I love the pedal steel guitar. so I started playing with the loops and then I just had to write a quick tune to use them. I'm not a life long CW fan, but I love George Jones and I guess its buried in my blood somewhere. This is just a simple progression, but it is my first attempt to play with voices and Oh BOY! I recorded my daughter too hot on the first verse, then she didn't sing with punch on the second and then she went back to college (so no retake). I'm a high tenor trying to sing baritone so I used the voice transformer to give me a hint of baritone. But the real problem is not having an environment to record in. We did it in the kitchen (noisy). Also singing into the internal iMAC mike is a real pain. My last problem is how to effectively patch loops together so that you don't get spikes. I tried an ending guitar strum that just sounds awful. If anyone has any advice I would appreciate it.

Lyrics:

First Train For Home
(c) 2008 Stephen M Schedra

Thought I could make it happen
If I moved into Manhattan
A dollar and a dream and I'm alone
Then I met a golden Starlet
Who looks just like a harlot
But I can't be a judge 'cause I'm the same

If its a different day or town
You know I'd love to stick around
But I'm leav'in on the first train for home

Dreams are bright and pretty
When they're made in NY City
But I left my dreams behind when I left home
And the princes are so charming
With their stories so disarming
So I took it all in stride now I'm the same

If its a different day or town
You know I'd love to stick around
But I'm leav'in on the first train for home

The whole world's at Penn Station
When I sense her hesitation
Then she sits by me and I know she's the one
Pressing through the faces
I've been lost in smaller spaces
Then a friendly face from home and I'm undone

Don't mind me sittin' down
I'd like your company leav'in town
'Cause I'm leav'in on the first train for home
Yes we're leav'in on the first train for home

Hardware:

iMAC

Software:

Garage Band

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First Train For Home &mdash 01/09/08 - 09:33:55 PM

Feter

Impressive ..the production is way cool
the slide guitar sound awesome ..sure
the pickin guitar gave in it more reality
the kitchen feel with your daughter sound
just made more wonderfull to hear her ..
perfect ending as well ...so the only
suggestion is to move the iMAC to the living
room .. :-) wink ...thnx alot for sharin it !

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I love pedal steel too &mdash 01/10/08 - 06:26:04 PM

cjhoose

You and your daughter have similar voices (i know... that sounds odd). It fits the song.

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Thanks for the comments &mdash 01/11/08 - 10:06:39 AM

sschedra

I don't want you to get the wrong idea. I am a high tenor (ala Stevie Winwood, Dave Davies). I used the vocal transformer in GarageBand to effect the baritone quality (I didn't change the pitch, but the timbre). Interesting thing about Becky. She has been trained in opera (colatura sopranno). She wouldn't know a country western song unless the train ran her over. So I had to constantly encourage her to "sing dirty" and "sing like you drank whiskey and then screamed all night at a football game". I think on the first verse she got the picture, She moved her voice up into her nose, but I blew the recording levels.

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i love this song! &mdash 01/11/08 - 08:34:42 AM

caroline

and i like the little imperfections too!! i would pay real money for this with them smoothed out - delicious - thank you

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Yup &mdash 01/11/08 - 09:23:41 AM

sschedra

Unless Becky will quit school and go on the road with me (or she comes home any time soon) her vocals are fixed. So I stopped short on this when she left me (Hm-m-m, sounds like the beginning of a new Country song) ;-)

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This is a good song &mdash 01/14/08 - 06:53:15 AM

dajama

I like the lyrics and the sentiment behind them. The recording part could be cleaner, for sure, but I truly believe that's something that can be addressed anytime. You've got the song, and the song is the thing, man! For your next track, I would suggest avoiding the vocal transformer. It has its uses, but I think it can also hold you back. Let your true voice shine through! I love the story about trying to get your daughter to sing country-style, by the way! Nice one. I'm looking forward to your next one. Peace.

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You two are great! &mdash 01/18/08 - 11:37:38 PM

Roxylee

You are a very good songwriter, and I love the energy in your music. Tell Becky I like this better than opera.

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I rarely... &mdash 01/28/08 - 10:01:31 PM

guitapick

...listen to the recording technique first or 2nd time around. I've only been at it since April '07. Takes time, but the important thing is where the song's coming from. I'm sure you know that.

I really like this. Pedal steel fan, too.

Fine tune, Stephen. Compliments to your daughter. You've got a nice voice, too. And I really like your guitar playing. Fits right in there. Sweet sound...

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Thanks &mdash 02/05/08 - 09:51:09 AM

sschedra

I still need to master getting a good mix in GB. Its not the same as doing a live mix or even using other consoles.

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Love the steel &mdash 02/04/08 - 08:10:24 AM

Rocha Malhada

great little C&W ditty here, not a huge fan but I like good ones. You could try some automation on your daughter's vocals to equal out the volume levels, that track does seem to clip a little. The vox effect on your vocals worked pretty nicely.

. - Harold

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Wow !!!! &mdash 02/12/08 - 08:20:19 PM

Dee1962z

Hello
My internet angel you have also a little angel of your very own too. Your daughter sang beautifully You both sang this duet great. Its really nice to hear families sing together and father and daughter is very nice combanation. I am always amazed at how clever you are and on the first take as well. I felt right at home.
with this great song many thanks for sharing this little 'Gem' as well :-)

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all over the place &mdash 02/14/08 - 12:06:36 PM

Warren Smith

Nice writing _ and some great rhymes.

I may have to steal that one for Manhattan : >

Your loopy music is all over the place, from opera to country-western to classical to rock, which makes it fun to listen to.

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Very fun &mdash 05/01/08 - 06:24:25 PM

sngwrtr

Anyone who likes George Jones is okay in my book! Love that stuff!

For me, this was a fun listen and I really enjoyed the duet aspect of it. Musically, it held my interest and had a nice "sing along quality" to it.

Lyrically, I wasn't as excited. I winced a little at the first two lines, but could live with them. However, the "golden starlet/just like a harlot" rhyme doesn't work at all for me. That simply isn't something you'll hear in today's country and, arguably, not even 30 yrs ago ('though maybe).

Another pairing that didn't really make much sense was the Penn Station/hesitation piece. I mean, is there a point in that? To me, it felt as though you were simply matching up rhyming lines with little regard to the continuity of the story.

I don't know what he thought he could "make happen in Manhattan" nor why he gave up so quickly (apparently), and why a "different day or town" might have made a difference.

And at that point, I don't know that I care any longer. What I mean by this is that the gaps or inconsistencies in the story left me disinterested.

I do think there is quite a bit of potential in this song and quite a bit of evidence of skillful songwriting that can be found here. I hope my critical comments are accepted in the manner they are intended!

Fun song to listen to ... like to hear more.

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Appreciate the critique &mdash 05/11/08 - 11:47:00 AM

sschedra

John,
Your remarks are accurate, as I just sort of threw this together to give me and becky a chance to do the duet. It really grew from me playing with the pedal steel loops. As a last effort Iquickly wrote the lyrics and then we did it. Myb very astute daughter also had problems with the lyrics, but I am such a slap dash impressionist, I just said "lets just do it!!

Honesty is appreciated and respected.
Stephen

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