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Description:
Eduard's Notes:
This is a song about people who cannot control their addiction to (sex/abuse/drugs/alcohol/fill-in-the-blank) and spiral to destruction, blaming everyone else but themselves.
Disclaimer: This is NOT about me, so don't get anxious! I am sure you have met some people who cannot seem to (or won't) escape from this destructive path they're on. I have known a number of them in my lifetime, one who was very close to me, and another who didn't make it out alive. This song is my attempt to capture the helplessness "in the first person." It was a difficult stretch for me to try to do well, since I am not an actor, nor a lyricist, nor a singer... and I'm usually upbeat, not dark and brooding.
So, here's my first attempt at singing into a microphone and sharing the result. If I pulled this off well, it will make you uncomfortable, due to the subject matter. If I did not pull it off, it will make you uncomfortable because I failed to get the message across persuasively. Either way, as always, I'm very interested in any comments you have. Please offer any positive and negative critiques about the subject matter, techniques, timing, singing, lyrics, mixing, etc... I welcome your thoughts!
History: The amazingly talented BorisLuxx posted an intrumental track called Toxicity... it grabbed my attention right away, and started whispering lyrics into my ear. The music rhythm suggested a new title, and I came up with "Toxic Desire", and the lyrics began to write themselves. I decided to pluck up my courage to try to sing them myself. My wife, after her initial anxiety of listening to me "drifting to the dark (wave) side", helped immensely with tweaks to my initial lyrics, and by coaching me on singing. Maurice (Moviz) suggested I drink some Bacardi prior to singing, but since I didn't have any around, I resorted to DragonSauce, which worked just as well... thanks Maurice, *hic!* Roxylee, after I let her peek at an early draft, asked to become the "siren", and fill the empty spaces with her harmonies and sultry ethereal subconscious beckoning... and this 3-way snowball-collaboration was born. After some drafts and suggested changes, she sent me her GarageBand file, and I manually merged her tracks into my GarageBand file and chopped, tweaked, requested changes, EQ'ed, and mixed/blended until I felt the song conveyed its desperate message. I eventually chopped and removed a bunch of Roxylee's singing, and hope that a future collaboration with less "busy" music will give her more space to share her remarkable singing with me. Thank you so much Boris and Roxylee for helping me create this "Cautionary Tale."
Artwork: A drawing I made to accompany a poem I wrote when I was 19... it seemed to fit here, so many years later.
Roxylee's Notes: When Drak said he was going to finally SING and needed someone to do background siren-y voices and play the other part, how could I not say "Ooh, pick me, pick me?" It's a far cry from our usual fare, but I've learned to "think outside the box" here in MacJams land. Not to worry, though; I'm still me - I haven't turned into a femme fatal or worse. My hope is that anyone who hears this and is stuck in an abusive relationship, addicted to alcohol, drugs, or anything that robs life of peace and vitality, will see how destructive it is, and start on the road to recovery. And if this song makes you want addictions, the prayer lines are open. :-)
Lyrics:
Toxic Desire
Part 1:
Your smell, Your taste
It clouds my thought
The poison taints
You're all I've got
I love your taste (..You)
Go down so smooth
I hate myself
As morning looms
You take from me
all day, all night
My job, my friends
I cannot fight
You prey on me
And know I'm weak
You lie to me
I cannot speak
Chorus:
Toxic Desire
Nowhere to go...
We both get lost
within our greed
Toxic Desire
What's wrong with me
There's nothing left
No Sanity
Your smell, Your taste
It clouds my thought
The poison taints (but)
You're all I've got
Part 2:
I love your taste
You blur my pain
I know I'll hate
myself again
You take from me
all night, all day
My life, my self
All drained away
You prey on me
And know I'm weak
You lie to me
(I cannot speak)
Copyright 2008 Eduard Schwan Poetry, All Rights Reserved
Roxylee's parts:
Desire x2
We're alone now, no one can see us
-
Thoughts of me obsess you now
I'm in every waking moment, in every dream
Come closer... closer!
-
No, I enhance
I'll make you strong
It's normal to need
come closer
(maniacal laughter)
I always win
..so very well
You know you can't live without me
Just one taste, and you're mine
-
Thoughts of me obsess you now
I'm in every waking moment, in every dream
Come closer... closer!
-
Yes, now I've got you
I'll make you strong
Shhhh....
Hardware:
Drakonis: intel Mac Pro, Saffire, AKG perception 200 condenser mic. Roxylee: Dual G4 Mac, Saffire LE, AKG perception 200 condenser mic.
Software:
Garageband 3 & 4, Harmony Assistant for melody writing and extra synth part, pando.com, DragonSauce
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Firstsies! &mdash 03/08/08 - 12:34:32 PM
Thank you, Eduard, for letting me take part in your debut singing post. J You played the part of the snared man chillingly well. This one was out of character for us, and it was fun to be an actress for the part of the siren voiced temptress. Your excellent attention to detail and mixing skills really show. I hope that this song will make people think, and it will serve as a warning to those who are in any danger of being addicted to anything. [ Reply to This ]
discomfort zone... &mdash 03/08/08 - 03:12:22 PM
what a stretch this was for me in many ways, thank you so much for helping with ideas and your parts, and being so patient as I re-arranged this over and over. I learned a great appreciation for singers who can pour emotion into their singing, AND actually hit the notes... it was really tricky to fit lyrics into an already-written awesome soundbed, and tricky to merge 2 GB files into 1, and getting the mix to sound halfway reasonable was beyond tricky. I feel I worked very hard on this and got a so-so result, due to my lack of talent... but this song really wanted to come out, and I did my best and learned a lot! Mostly I learned not to sing any more... I'll leave that to you! :-)
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
You learned &mdash 03/08/08 - 06:27:02 PM
not to sing? Say it isn't so! If you sang a love song or anything on the light side, it would be in character and a lot easier to do. I'm really wanting to sing with you again sometime! And I want to hear you play your dulcimer again. The hard work you put into this to integrate all the parts, EQ it and balance the volumes was a lot of work, and I am in awe of your skills in doing all that so well. I deeply appreciate all the time you spent in mixing all the tracks. And did I mention I want to sing with you again? :-) [ Reply to This ]
Great &mdash 03/08/08 - 12:53:45 PM
Wow... This sounds great... A good intro... And i like the vocals... Good kick drum.... And it has some great synth on it... Thanks for sharing... [ Reply to This ]
good, bad and ugly &mdash 03/08/08 - 03:17:12 PM
Hi Jakob... thank you for listening to this dark tale. The original synth piece by BorisLuxx is great, you should listen to it by itself sometime. I did add my own synth extra bits here and there to his piece, but mostly it is his powerful driving music that propels the anxiety in this piece.
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
WOW ..... &mdash 03/08/08 - 12:55:20 PM
I'm addicted ...... this is fabulous .... you know I am a huge fan (and addict) of the DARK SIDE of music ... and this one totally hit the spot - but you know now that I've had the taste of dragonvox ... I'm gonna be needing another fix .... so you must keep singing ... you should be very proud indeed of this one Drakonis ... and Roxylee (who knew girl!!!) wow ... welcome to the darknes !!! [ Reply to This ]
El Anna Vira, mistress of the Dark wave... &mdash 03/08/08 - 03:24:07 PM
Hey there m'lady, too bad you are addicted to DragonVox now, I don't think I can do anything like this again. This was a little too ambitious a project for me, and although I think I got close to getting the dark creepy aspect nailed, there would be so much vocal training I would need to do this right, that I really need to step back and let the more accomplished singers do this. However, I must admit secretly that this was a blast to try, and was well worth doing... I'm very happy to know it hit the spot for you. I have a feeling there are a bunch of Macjammers out there, mouths agape in horror, wondering what happened to that nice innocent little dragon they thought they knew. (Smirk)
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
Toxic Desire &mdash 03/08/08 - 01:01:16 PM
theatrical performance ...Draki the sauce works well
..Roxy you can do magic .Boris this was FUN !!
are you sure it was a sauce I wanna try it !!
works with human software ? [ Reply to This ]
DragonSauce - the secret &mdash 03/08/08 - 03:32:25 PM
Feter, my friend... thank you for your positive support! Yes, this turned out as a theatrical performance, but I tried to not go too far into melodrama and lose the message. Roxylee did a super job weaving thoughts between my words. BorisLuxx's music is relentless and awesome.
DragonSauce is my name for my favorite liquor... a Mexican sweet coffee-flavored liquor called "Kahlua". A little bit goes a LONG way. :-) Now you know. [ Reply to This ]
WOW!!! &mdash 03/08/08 - 01:18:38 PM
Hi all
You certainly are three very talented individuals. Well done.
A very good 'EXCELLENT' callab and Drak you sounded great your voice was amazing and hauntingly scary
you certainly did also have the totally amazing BorrisLuxx so how could this work of art possibly fail. lol
Rokylee and her sweet voice as usual. It was also a nice change something different.-to make people think ?
Now my dad used to say to us kids when we was small everything in moderation will not do you any harm within reason..
Ha ha
But we are one of the biggest Families in Britain and have been in the newspapers fact. Growing all the time. Although my parents sadly
passed away of old age years ago.
Peace
Dee
[ Reply to This ]
Oops. &mdash 03/08/08 - 01:22:37 PM
I forgot I was going out for a drink tonight , but I don't think I'll bother
hee hee. [ Reply to This ]
hauntingly scary... &mdash 03/08/08 - 03:39:37 PM
that is what I was going for. I tried to write lyrics and sing to sound desperate and weak, without sounding "whiny", which was hard to walk that fine line.
Funny to hear about your dad's quote about moderation, then his excitement about having lots of children... because one of MY dad's favorite quotes was ALMOST the same... "Everything in moderation, including moderation." Which I thought was quite humorous, and is perfect dragon philosophy.
I'm glad you listened to this with an open mind... quite a departure from my normal style. Don't worry, my next ones will be regular DrakTunes :-)
ttfn,
Drakonis
(PS - I enjoy a glass of wine, or DragonSauce every month or so) [ Reply to This ]
Toxic Desire &mdash 03/08/08 - 01:40:00 PM
Wonderful production. Love the vocals, strange atmosphere, very dense and intoxicating. Great work! [ Reply to This ]
blush &mdash 03/09/08 - 11:11:58 AM
It is a great compliment from an accomplished singer like yourself, I realized that with no vocal training, I would have to half-speak, half sing the words in a more theatrical style. And yes, I was trying to get an uncomfortable "claustrophobic" feeling with the mix, without it being too distracting. Thank you very much for taking this difficult journey with me, Andreas! Now back to your regularly scheduled happy thoughts! ;-)
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
right then eduard &mdash 03/08/08 - 02:12:36 PM
welcome to the world of "vocal exposure"...lol .. well you done did it now old friend dragon. you can sing and now will be expected to hear again ... very well done drak and roxy ... she is wonderful on this! only nit ...haha my turn now! ... some places you seemed to be hiding a bit with your vocals ... [wow that felt strange.. critiquing the dragon] no nits reall y at all drak and roxy ... this work is great ... very much enjoyed! [ Reply to This ]
Me? Sing? &mdash 03/09/08 - 11:18:59 AM
Nah, like dragons, it was a figment of your imagination...
WHOA, finally, a critique! Thank you Jack, I am glad to have you point out things I should improve on. I admit, I am a bit shy boosting my voice on this, and it was hard to get the complicated mix just right to cut a notch in the music for my (and Roxylee's) vocals to be heard, BorisLuxx's music is very rich and I hated disturbing it much. Anyway, I think I should have tried to boost the vox ever so slightly. There were MANY places I manually adjusted the volume curve up and down to get the vox levels to be heard. This whole project was a HUGE challenge for me, and I learned a lot. I think I'll go back to something simpler now, like writing complex computer software. :-)
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
Great Work,... &mdash 03/08/08 - 02:21:20 PM
you three. Roxy good job being the voice of darkness, you know, you putting yourself in that role, and Eduard, nothing negative, you sing just fine!!! Boris Luxx does nice synth work. A nice sounding piece. [ Reply to This ]
nice? &mdash 03/09/08 - 11:29:12 AM
Nice sounding piece? I did something wrong... its supposed to crawl inside your brain and squirm around and make you want to turn it off. :-)
Well OK, not quite. I'm happy to know that this was dark and listenable Ian, and very happy you stopped by to listen and comment. It is not our happy bouncy Flamenco Technoid piece...
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
Just my way of talking,... &mdash 03/09/08 - 04:48:34 PM
nice means great, like rich means not allot of money but full of flavor, flamenco lingo. It does everything you hoped for as far as I am concerned!!!
Ian [ Reply to This ]
Its like sitting in a &mdash 03/08/08 - 02:46:52 PM
theatre and look to an opera comin' by...Beautiful piece with only strong sides...ENjoyed. [ Reply to This ]
Funny you mention opera &mdash 03/09/08 - 11:31:52 AM
This is what my wife said before I posted it, that it seemed like watching actors on stage performing opera in some ways, but definitely not any kind of "popular music" style piece. Thank you for listening to the piece, and commenting, I appreciate you giving feedback. Glad to hear you think it is a strong piece.
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
As .. &mdash 03/08/08 - 03:34:53 PM
.. a hopeless addict of filling-in-the-blanks .. I just had to comment ;o)
Big Euro-pop feel - akin perhaps to Visage's 'Fade to Grey'...shares some qualities.
Mix was excellent overall - something did strike me a little uncomfortable stereo field wise .. might be my ears or taste .. is something very low/bass moving around nearer the end??
I liked the way the low synth stabs moved around in the intro- that was very effective.
Fine delivery on the vocals Eduard .. half spoken, half sung, kinda an American Neil Tennant- fits the genre/music .. and excellent supportive additions from Roxanne .. those have room to come up a fraction IMO.
Is it just me or is there something reminscent of the modern Winnie the Pooh ..but after the watershed.. honey addiction.. must be that...hmm... not sure what
gives me that..poetic phrasing?? accent?? Pay no heed..
Deep bows to you, Boris and Roxanne. Dark matter, strong song. [ Reply to This ]
I'm looking down, Pooh... &mdash 03/09/08 - 12:07:02 PM
Alan, always a rush to get your eloquent thoughts! I always love people pointing out connections to other music I've not heard of here, so I must go find "Fade to Grey" and listen, thank you!
The mix was a hydra of a beast to work on! Challenged me to the ends of the earth with levels and EQ! Some of the light chorus/phaser I added to Roxylee's vox was to make her voice get "unhinged" from the stereo field and wander around in your brain. I added a moving synthesizer wash in a few spots and mixed it in with Richard's music, and when it shows up at the very end of the piece, you hear the super-low-end note rumble and reverb away into the distance. I wanted to leave with an eerie foreboding feel, perhaps I didn't do it properly?
Thanks for the vox compliments, I still feel very shy about even attempting to sing. That may be why I have my vox back a little ways... and then I needed Roxylee's vox even more ethereal and wispy... so perhaps I need to bring them both forward a little more (on headphones it seems fine, but when I played it on the stereo, the voices did sound further back, I noticed that and adjusted them forward a little once.)
Funny thing about Winnie the Pooh... my wife and I read those stories to each other from time to time, and despite the "chidren's story" stigma, she and I constantly giggle by reading them with very adult eyes. And it helps that Milne was a GREAT story teller. Funny though, I remember when I first started trying to sing this, I kept slipping into a British accent... perhaps there's a bit of that remaining in parts? Cottleston cottleston cottleston pie, A dragon can't sing, I don't know why...
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
BRAVO!!! &mdash 03/08/08 - 04:02:38 PM
Eduard, this is masterful in every way. Yes it's a dark subject matter, but this is how we shine light on it. I think your vocal debut is 100% successful and I'm so proud of you for having the courage to give it a try. Boris's synth work and Roxy's vocals make a fabulous mix here. It's chilling and cautionary in just the way you'd hoped. Now the cat's out of the bag and you'll be needing to do lots more vocals - your singing career is just starting. EXCELLENT mix, great editing, all the technical stuff sounds perfecto to my ear. Congratulations - the Dragon Flies!! [ Reply to This ]
There's a light.. deep in the Frankenstein place... &mdash 03/09/08 - 12:18:24 PM
Hey there Karen, thank you for stopping in, and being so supportive. Yes, shining a light is an apropos aphorism for my purpose here. It took courage to tackle something so technically challenging, and to overcome my lack of confidence in trying to sing. But BorisLuxx's excellent music, and Roxylee's incredible support, great recordings, and versatile accomodating attitude as I chopped/changed/asked for more/less through this whole thing was a lifesaver. Also my wife was extremely helpful and supportive, and very glad its over, as am I.
I may try singing again sometime, but not in any major way, it is way too hard to do. As I said before, way too many other people here do that much better.
The technical hurdle of figuring how to write the lyrics and pick a melody and fit it all into the existing sound bed was a real challenge too. I learned a LOT from doing this! Thank you for waiting so impatiently for this to come out, you're a delight! :-)
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
Powerful and Professional! &mdash 03/08/08 - 05:29:00 PM
Great production and the point is well made. Anyone who has been around addiction (all of us?) can re-experience the ebb and flow in this song. I think the music, the lyric, the performance and the production are all first rate. Eduard, you have a pleasant voice and I for one would encourage you to write more pieces that feature it. Rox is just scary playing dark-side and I now have to bathe just for listening. Altogether it was a potent and psycho-dramatical picture of the cycle of the sin of self destruction.
Very impressed,
Stephen [ Reply to This ]
catch my breath &mdash 03/10/08 - 11:40:38 PM
Thank you very much for your encouragement and thoughtful response, Stephen! Perhaps we all think of our own voices as just so-so, and I am glad to know it is listenable (my wife loves me reading to her, so it can't be that bad, can it?) Perhaps I'll take your suggestion and tell a story, or try a poem... singing is a bit out of my league though. I'm in agreement with you about Roxylee, I too felt like this was the Anti-Roxy, and I had to make sure she was back to normal afterward... she did an exquisite job on this! I'm glad you felt the psycho-drama. Now on to something a little less chilling.
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
Told you so!!! &mdash 03/08/08 - 07:25:52 PM
I knew it would be great and it is! Wonderful job friend! You and Roxylee did a wonderful job here. She sounded so evil ....whoa that laugh...loved it. You both did an awesome job and Eduard, I think you should continue onto the next step...which is...singing more and speaking less. This is a fantastic start! Great collab. Sultry song.....Toxic indeed. Way to go my friend!!! [ Reply to This ]
Evil Roxylee &mdash 03/10/08 - 11:45:54 PM
Boris's music was the backbone of this. I appreciate you coming and listening to this tale I wove, and I promise to speak more and sing less... that's what you said, right? Roxylee's performance gave ME chills... it was hard not to just copy that one laugh and paste it all over the song :-) But her other parts were great too... thank you for your comments. Perhaps another attempt with this nice microphone is in order soon?
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
Hey how about a song &mdash 03/09/08 - 12:00:33 AM
...about controlling your addictions, hehehe thats always the favored situation, but must say this is a fun listen, the instrumentaion is top notch and the broadway disco vocals work really well together with the music, good job all involved! [ Reply to This ]
out of control &mdash 03/10/08 - 11:53:02 PM
Yah, the topic is often done... I was hoping to be somewhat unique by portraying being already mired and losing the will to escape. Boris's music really was wanting vocals, and this is what sprung to mind for me. It was a huge endeavor for me, since I've never written a song nor sung one... so I'm glad you found that it was a worthwhile listen. I think I will go back to simpler things now for a while, though!
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
didn't know dragons could sing! &mdash 03/09/08 - 03:49:36 AM
DragonSong &mdash 03/10/08 - 11:55:28 PM
Hi Lou!
Dragons love to sing, they just don't want anyone to hear them do it!
Thank you for checking out my very first song-writing and singing attempt. Now I give the microphone back to you, since you know what you are doing, and write such great songs!
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
Great backing track .. &mdash 03/09/08 - 04:29:42 AM
.. really cool interpretation Eduard! I often think Boris's tracks would be even better with a vocal, and you've pulled it off really well. Shades of Richard Harris and Leonard Cohen - and a little Rocky Horror ;) Roxy does a great job also - very out of character Roxy, but very well done.
I'm impressed Eduard!
Neil [ Reply to This ]
two out-of-characters &mdash 03/11/08 - 12:02:11 AM
Neil!
Roxylee and I both enjoyed dressing up in Rocky Horror Goth-tumes and doing the Time Warp here, and then quietly burying the characters in the back yard. I learned so much, about singing, writing melodies and lyrics, mixing voices over music tracks... mostly I learned that I have so much to learn that I need to pick my paths carefully, and not take on too many things. One thing I don't have time for at this late stage, is voice lessons. So I will likely not attempt anything quite like this again. But spoken stuff may happen again soon... silly to have this cool microphone and not use it?
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
The singing &mdash 03/09/08 - 07:27:32 AM
and the emotion you give to this are just right it has wonderful sounds in this song, but just think if you HAD swigged some Bicardi and lemon WoWW! LOL (Joke). It's like an electronic operetta warning people of the effects of certain vices. I love the mix of sounds and the vocals which give that very seductive, slinky feel are excellent. You said it was a stretch for you, but the elastic seems to be wearing well LOL, regards M [ Reply to This ]
With this &mdash 03/09/08 - 07:32:58 AM
performance we may just be hearing you and Roxie on the next version of Michael Jackson's 'Thriller', cheers M [ Reply to This ]
With &mdash 03/09/08 - 07:35:26 AM
vocals like this, we may just be hearing you and Roxie on Michael Jackson's next version of 'Thriller' if he does one, cheers M [ Reply to This ]
Another round of DragonSauce &mdash 03/11/08 - 12:06:46 AM
Maurice, Thanks for the suggestion of loosening the vox with alcohol, I took your suggestion and it did help (DragonSauce is "Kahlua", my liquor-of-choice.) I appreciate you checking back to see what I created, glad you enjoyed the show. Yes, a stretch for this middle-aged dragon, but stretches are good exercise, and I continue to stretch here and there just to surprise people... dragons are like that.
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
the bear was here.... &mdash 03/09/08 - 07:39:20 AM
but had to leave suddenly to find balloons, marshmallows, pink and fluffy things - 'praps you should take that as a compliment to the way the three of you expressed the dark side? big loves xoxox [ Reply to This ]
P &mdash 03/11/08 - 12:10:35 AM
Hi Caro2ine, I'm back, right as rain, see? It was just a song. We're all back in Kansas now. And your little bear too! I promise to do something fluffy and not so serious and gritty-real, OK?
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
love the taste &mdash 03/09/08 - 09:29:40 AM
I think you laid it out there just right. Your vocal sounds great. A slight anticipation and plaintive quality that adds a big emotional element to the track. Boris's soundbed is excellent and kudo's to Roxy for the perfect accents. [ Reply to This ]
thanks for the kudos &mdash 03/11/08 - 09:56:51 PM
Actually, figuring out how/where to lay out the lyrics, then how to lay out Roxylee's parts (she gave me a couple of great takes, then I rearranged them and deleted stuff, poor girl! :-) Getting it all to fit without overcrowding was really complex, and I learned a LOT! Roxylee is incredibly patient and talented, perhaps another collab will happen down the road a bit. Boris's music is way cool, as always. I hope he swings by to see all the accolades swung his way... he's a bit busy just now though. Thank you again for listening and commenting, I love your amazing keyboard writing/playing!
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
ok...a singing horny dragfon &mdash 03/09/08 - 01:17:44 PM
a troubling thought. Can they fly when aroused, or is their an issue of weight balance displacement?
The perception 200 mic gives us guys with the reedy pipes a chance at johnny mathis-hood. Good mic choice!
This is a depraved song of lust and obsession. Which doesn't surprise me at all from you. The singing does surprise me tho...very good and very appropriate for the tune. the backing music is sublime as always.
good for you, taking these chances with your goods...much respect!
deep bows dragon!
z [ Reply to This ]
Ziti you goof! &mdash 03/11/08 - 10:01:48 PM
Sheesh, you know the answer to that, dragons are always... uh... anyway, yes, I believe it was YOU who tipped the balance when I was weighing mic choices, and I got that on your recommendation. And I liked it so much, Roxylee got the same one based on my experience with it... so... AKG thanks you!
The singing was a lot of work, writing lyrics, fitting them into a song, then actually singing them! The only thing harder would be to sing them live on stage... or worse, sing live on stage while playing a guitar or something at the same time, that would blow my mind. Oh, that's right... that's what YOU do. I'll leave that to the masters. Deep bows back at you sir! Thank you for listening to my little baby step here.
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
Phantom ... &mdash 03/09/08 - 05:13:14 PM
...of the Opera - esque... Really engaging orchestration and vocal rendition. Very haunting performance. It is definitely a stage piece and, in my opinion, stacks up well with the best of them. Applause for pushing what you thought were your boundaries...Now you are in a whole different arena. Chilling ending swirl...
Peace.
Paul [ Reply to This ]
Webber or not I agree doesn't matter &mdash 03/11/08 - 10:07:50 PM
Paul, thank you for listening to this and commenting. I guess it does come out sounding a bit like a musical production, I hadn't really intended for it to, but my wife mentioned that it felt more "operatic" too, so, there we are. I don't think that Roxylee would look good in a horned helmet and spear though.
Definitely pushed my boundaries and I had to try new things I'd not tried before... learned a lot, so it was all worth it. And hopefully a thought-provoking piece. I added my own extra synth downward spiral at the very end to give a visceral "shaking of your gut." Glad you noticed.
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
8 ) ( , &mdash 03/09/08 - 06:30:47 PM
...so U aren't a 'workaholic' then?(just kidding Eduard!) I find this Amazing.....yesterday I heard it several times LOUD -which I think I anyhow MUST to get the right 'feelin' experiencing it & hear the Power of it 8 ) ..THAT was awesome, just now I'm lissening quietly which is VERY different. Like it better LOUD . Your voice then sounds Very 'powerful' & in its strength ! I think You did this REALLY GREAT!!! : ): ) Its a STRONG Song with all three parts/Music/R-L/You in an excellent combination all being just as important Give Yourself credit for it Drakonis(Iwas very proud of my 2 spokenpoems I did in my Life...lmao-i changed my voice/dilect then though it was really FUN to do Lol!) How did it feel doing it? it seems You 'were there' 100% when I play it loud & alittle bit less when playing it quieter?How many takes did U do on this? It seems You ENJOYED it (( 8 RoxyLees laughter is really OOTW (Out Of This World)....WOW back to description gotto read it all..OK HAHAHAhahhaha no baccardi lol ! DRAGONSAUCE!!! well it turned out just fine with that:) To me this isn't 'scary' at all just wonderful & INSPIRING!!it may be 'scarey' to some(the more fears inside yourself not delt with the more things outside scare you) One thing..I don't like when You write in description 'it will make You feel uncomfortable(or not) etc..' as its not up to You to tell the lissener what to 'feel'. & whichever way WE feel its NOT a matter of You failing!(!)
This inspires me !!! I lissened to Borisluxx original (GREAT!)& there saw You were inspired right away with it! A month ago only : )
tx Lena(or You can call me Say)
oh yeah.. I'm sorry I cannot hear RoxyLees words as good/clear/ as Yours a bit muffled
:( As Her voice makes the 'dot over the i' as we say in swedish, 'The Icing' of the Cake I wish I heard exactly what she's saying being a swede! [ Reply to This ]
loud is good &mdash 03/11/08 - 10:17:46 PM
Hi Lena,
I had a lot of trouble making the words loud, without messing up the music. So I think you are right, it needs to be loud to hear it. But somebody with more experience than me could do a better mixing job. I may try again to boost Roxylee some more (her parts were soft, and she's up to the max, so I have to adjust other things down.) But I promise I will add her words to the lyrics above tomorrow, so you can read what she says!
Yes, Roxylee's additions are the dot on the i, or the icing on the cake, I agree.
I enjoyed doing this, yes. But it was also technically hard work, so by the end I was exhausted.
In the description when I said "if I did this right, you will feel uncomfortable...", I am not "telling you how to feel"... it was supposed to mean "this is not a happy song, it is supposed to make you feel uncomfortable". I was just warning people that it is not my usual happy stuff. But you are right, I do not want to tell people how to feel.
Thank you for your very detailed thoughts and comments, IN ENGLISH! I really appreciate that, and I will type up Roxylee's words for you!
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
hi &mdash 03/12/08 - 03:18:02 PM
Great to have R-L words ! I know what You meant Drakonis, just wanted to point it out to You : ) Great Job ! [ Reply to This ]
Very interesting &mdash 03/09/08 - 10:01:12 PM
song and perspective... I found this to be almost theatrical in style... and very cool. Loved the synth sounds and the vocals were really perfect for what you were trying to do.
Eduard, your voice is unique and distinctive... don't be afraid to share it more often! [ Reply to This ]
Adam, you buttering me up? &mdash 03/11/08 - 10:20:33 PM
Thank you for the compliment and suggestion of sharing my voice more... perhaps, your thoughtful words help me feel a little more confident about it. And I'm glad the rather theatrical style didn't go over the top, I wanted this to remain rather gritty and real.
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
You have every reason to be proud of this &mdash 03/09/08 - 10:14:16 PM
The word "epic" came to mind while listening to this. The production of the instrumental tracks is excellent, and includes changes in pace that really help keep the song flowing. This aspect of arranging is often overlooked, and its inclusion here is very effective. The instrumental tracks also do an excellent job of creating the foreboding mood that is so appropriate here. Roxy's delivery in the role of the seductress is simply outstanding and adds a spice that elevates this song immeasurably.
Then there's your debut as a singer. What a perfect piece of music for it this is. It allows you great liberty, singing and talk-singing as the moment inspired. The result is a complete success from my viewpoint. Your urgency comes though clearly and enhances the song, rather than distracting, meaning you never crossed over into becoming theatric, which could easily have happened.
I have lost friends to addiction during my life, and this song hits home. I would call it an unequivocal success. Congratulations on stepping out of your comfort zone and making it work so well... [ Reply to This ]
Boris et al &mdash 03/13/08 - 12:24:14 PM
BorisLuxx's relentless but well-thought-out instrumental is what started my mind spinning in this direction in the first place, so I echo your compliments to Boris on his music! However, starting with the ready-made music, and trying to shoehorn some lyrics and melody on top of it was a very "educational" experience for me, especially as a first attempt at writing/singing a song, this became extremely challenging for me.
I'm glad that my talk-singing fit, and didn't wander into melodrama for you... the point and subject are not lost. Roxylee did an outstanding job here. Thank you for listening and offering your thoughts on this, they are always very helpful to me!
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
Good vocals.... &mdash 03/10/08 - 03:41:59 PM
I really think your vocals are good... Good work.... Thumbs up for that.... [ Reply to This ]
From one Beach Boy to Another... &mdash 03/13/08 - 12:26:23 PM
Hi Jakob... you have such great talent writing wonderful music, melodies, and writing lyrics and singing them too... your comments mean a great deal to me! And, now that I have attempted to do what you do so easily... I am even more impressed by your talent! Thank you for commenting!
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
Self-confidence &mdash 03/10/08 - 04:57:39 PM
Self-confidence is a tough thing to come by, especially when you're kinda putting yourself out there a bit, doing something you've never done before. Coming to the party as late as I am, I can only pile on and echo sentiments already expressed: we're all so glad you gave this a go.
There's definitely a preconceived notion floating out there of what a singer's supposed to sound like (from a radio point of view, anyway). Even off this standard, at the most elemental level, you have performed perfectly for this message and with this mood. I don't care if the words dance the line between sung and spoken - they're just right the way you've done them. I'd go so far as to say your own self-perceived limitations when recording actually enhanced - helped to create? - the flavor you were chasing after: anxious, claustrophobic ... even shy about making the admission of addiction.
Artwork is killer, too. Such a multi-talented dragon. Is there anything you haven't tackled successfully? [ Reply to This ]
interesting points &mdash 03/13/08 - 12:33:29 PM
There was a lot of trepidation in attempting this, and it turned out to be more technically challenging than I thought... so it could be that there was some real fatigue/anxiety/resignation in my voice as well as the acted versions of them. Thank you, as always, for your astute thoughts and ear. And for noticing the artwork too :-) I thought the artwork was a lot better than the silly teenage poem it accompanied, so it was worth rescuing from my dusty poem book.
Things I haven't tackled successfully? Of course! Drums! I look to you for drumming! I can count to 2 or three and then get totally lost.
ttfn,
Drakonis [ Reply to This ]
Thank you, everybody! &mdash 03/10/08 - 10:08:36 PM
I'm so glad that Eduard sang/spoke this, as hard as it was to do, being a composer and not having sung for us yet. I hope he will keep on singing! :-)He did a wonderful job of portraying how we can get lured into a trap. The sound bed by Boris Luxx was fabulous for this song. And I really enjoyed acting like the evil Queen of Narnia. I really appreciate all your comments, and all the time and effort that Eduard took to perfect this. Thank you! :-) [ Reply to This ]
~ &mdash 03/11/08 - 10:17:26 AM
Like your voice, Eduard...I've known many people who would fall into the "self-destructive" niche...difficult if not impossible to help out...Roxylee's got a very subtle, sinister laugh, you know...
Powerful piece... [ Reply to This ]
and Bob... &mdash 03/11/08 - 01:22:32 PM
What's really scary is that it wasn't hard to do- that sinister, evil laugh came way too easily for me. Hmmm.. I'll blame it on too much tv all these years, as I can't afford a shrink. :-) [ Reply to This ]
dextrous at sinister &mdash 03/13/08 - 12:39:20 PM
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