Welcome to MacJams! It takes a while for people to get to know your music when you're new, but hopefully they will, and you start to get more comments.

Your description of this as 'gothic' certainly fits! It's got a dark, disturbing quality, the kind of music the would work very well in a horror film. But it also stands on its own very well.

There are some crunchy chords in your basic progression that contribute to this dark quality, as do the unexpected but equally affective (yes, affective, as in affecting your mood) and unpredictable chord changes that happen from time to time. That said, you also have a few secondary dominants in the progression, and they have the opposite quality in that they are so commonly used throughout the 400 year history of tonal music, that you know what the resolution is likely to be when your hear them. My own feeling -- and take it for what it's worth, because I'm sure others may not hear it this way -- is that it might be interesting to try a piece like this with very few, if any, predictable chord progressions, because it would constantly keep the listener on edge, feeling unsettled, which I think is the mood you're going for.

Finally, it might be a good idea to post your lyrics in the 'lyrics' area above, rather than a link, because I suspect most people, like me, are too lazy to go to another website to read them!

Oh, and your voice is great for this!




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...I was being a bit lazy myself in just putting a link. I know what you mean about the chord progressions - I was going for a mixture of the known and unknown - in that this is a mythic piece, albeit a strange one. I appreciate your comments and will take them on board.

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Your style, I think, has a lot going for it. I genuinely feel that your vocals outclass your instrumentals.

The sounds of the horn and the organ were pretty thread-bare. To achieve an ominous and real atmosphere, I would recommend tinkering with an AU Matrix Reverb effect %u2013�maybe a cathedral sound? But it depends on what you're going for.

Later on you really achieved some "crunchy chords," as Clark said. I was surprised that the quality rose so much. Seemed like your simpler sounds weren't as good as your complex sounds.

Thanks for the melody! I'll be checking out the rest.




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I'm learning more about mixing/mastering process. The reason why I didn't do the cathedral reverb is because I find that it has become a bit cliche in this sort of music. Perhaps threadbare works with the ice landscape no? Anyway, that was the feeling I was trying to intone. Thanks for your comments - I have really enjoyed your work also.

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I would consider emphasising the more electronic aspects...

I think the chord sequence is great

Areas I think could be improved on include the vocal sound (initially a bit muddy but seems to improve in the latter part of the song - maybe consider using a clearer reverb or eqing some of the bass/mid freqs out of the tonal range?)

The drums: again seem to work better in the 2nd half but I am not sure the drum pattern you have chosen in the first part is quite as effective

I REALLY enjoyed this - I would love to hear it develop

b

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The vocals have always been the weakest part of my recordings - mainly due to inadequate mics and a general shyness to sing on my part. I think I improve on each project - but I'm still learning to get the best out of my voice!

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Some very interesting and unusual stuff going on here.
I think your vocals are being swamped by the orchestration and need to be brought out more and lyrics are a must. As Composerclark says people are too lazy to look at another link and may lose interest if they cannot understand the lyrics (mind you, on second listen, they start to become clearer).
Your vocal is very good and I understand your shyness but you must overcome it. When you are singing in a deeper tone than usual they need to be even louder and clearer.
Strangely the song I am working on at the moment also leans on some middle eastern vocal influences which I notice in this piece.
Looking forward to hearing more from you.
Cheers
Len





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To my ears, the lower vocal (first verse) is quite clear - but the second (mostly falsetto) got lost - so I doubled it with a lower megaphone voice. Vocals are getting stronger - but still learning to mix my voice, which has a difficult timbre. Let me know when you post the piece your talking about - I love Eastern sounding stuff like Dead Can Dance, Vas, etc.

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cup of tea. I'm kind of a Electronica freak and now leaning towards Trance. But I love the work you put into it and the lyrics again are super cool!

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This was sort of a sound poem - and I love doing those.

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it is an interesting feeling of music. the drumming is not fitting well. but the organ and singing is a hypnotic sound. it is almost gregorian chant sound? sugoi... yukionna is ancient japanese story! is the snow goddess. yukionna is terrifying creature. the lyrics create new meaning, new thoughts. it creates new snow. 0x0

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