Should have seen the 6, 6, 6, score coming.

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A great sound overall. It is modern and old sounding at
the same time. What is making the music? Sort of aKen
nordine sound to it.

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I did the back music track using my Edirol PCR-30. I'm still learning how
to play with it. I don't know how to play music, don't know one note
from another. I may still play with the track.

The weird sweeping noise is the track hiss with effect on it.

I wanted more bongo sounding drums like off the Stones "Sympathy for
the Devil," but couldn't them to sound right.

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Is there a meaning to all this?
www.thisflapfirst.com

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Hi Chris. I like the effects you put on the vocals. It
meshes real well with the feel of the poem and the
background sounds. I also like the dramatic reading –
good use of pauses and enunciation. I don’t like the
drums though – they don’t seem to fit. I don’t think it
needs percussion. But if you want percussion, go for
something a little more off the wall than a standard drum
kit. (7-7-7-7)

JG


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The effect you put on your voice fits to this poem.
For me, I think the sound of drums is a bit too light.
I would chose heavier drum sound for this one.

: )



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The music and drums are fine, as far as I'm concerned, and they work well with the otherworldliness of your voice. I'm not convinced the melodramatic pauses breaking up the flow of the lines add any real depth to the story - that a straight reading with dramatic emphasis on certain words might actually be more shocking. It's a great first line and I don't think it should be broken up as an opening gambit.

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I agree, but doing it as a straight reading has other problems. 1. It's too
short. :) and 2. I would have to speak over the drums.

I didn't like breaking it up this was, and sometimes parts of sentences ended
up on one side of the beats that really shouldn't be divided (as you pointed
out).

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Is there a meaning to all this?
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i agree you could have more fun with the drums. try
reverb & freak it with some filters. maybe they could
change thruout the poem & end up in a different place at
the end to reinforce your last line of lyrics. great job
creating the mood.. i like the twist of the 'story'

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Nice exploration of evil/the persona of "the devil".
Just be careful, music and prose in connection with
the devil can get a little freaky sometimes. (Watch for
the all black cadillac outside your house, or a crow
on your windowsill) -especially if you insult the devil
in your poem or poke fun at him. That sheeyat is
real. Next thing you know...your wiskey gets
poisoned.

I think it's interesting you say you were trying to
make it reminiscent of the stones' 'sympathy', since
it's a whole different kinda thing. Way spookier than
that old chestnut. (their song makes the devil seem
like the thin duke (bowie) wearing a red suit and
horns and having a party at a country club or
something)

Nice use of words, and to be honest ...I love poems
and songs about the devil. I guess it's freaky that I
do, but it isn't like I have interst in the devil
otherwise.

Would love to know what inspired this work..

Also, for the sake of suggestion:
How bout experimenting with altering the 'voice' of
the devil, maybe use a pitch change or something, to
clearly seperate the dialouge, until at the end you
could blend them together into the same voice.

Don't change the tales from the crypt background
music though, that's gotta stay.
In fact, I would entertain the idea of taking this and
re-mastering it for you if you're down with that (for
your pre-approval before posting). I would need the
.band file.

I have a song that it would make a excellent spoken
word intro for. Actually a couple of em. One is titled
"The devil don't know who he works for". (please
don't take that title if you are reading this and
thinking about it. )

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Would love to know what inspired this work.

It was part of a triptych I wrote while I was dating one half of a set of identical
twins. I used to go everywhere with both of them, and got a huge kick out of
sitting between two beautiful women everywhere I went. We all did martial
arts together too, so I got to knock them around on a regular basis as well
(they often gave better than they got). I love organized violence.

Anyway, I did one about what I would be like as a twin, then wrote the above
poem. I didn't end up liking the other poem in the series, so I guess it's a
diptych now.

Also, for the sake of suggestion:
How bout experimenting with altering the 'voice' of
the devil, maybe use a pitch change or something, to
clearly separate the dialogue, until at the end you
could blend them together into the same voice.

Well, I have GB2 now, so that sounds like a cool idea.

Don't change the tales from the crypt background
music though, that's gotta stay.
In fact, I would entertain the idea of taking this and
re-mastering it for you if you're down with that (for
your pre-approval before posting). I would need the
.band file.

Absolutely. I love seeing what others do with my stuff. I'll put it up on my
server when I get home.

I have a song that it would make a excellent spoken
word intro for. Actually a couple of em. One is titled
"The devil don't know who he works for". (please
don't take that title if you are reading this and
thinking about it. )

Your title is safe.---
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Is there a meaning to all this?

www.thisflapfirst.com

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