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Rats!


by

cplacito

 Genre: Acoustic Rock
No artwork

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Description
really poorly done, really poorly executed
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Lyrics
Oh oh oh we sing a song
And all the world could sing along
But its not our song to sing
It’s a shoplifted
grab and run
pickpocket melody
a clever form of forgery
A band of rats and dirty petty thieves
When all the lives that we left behind
Were only counterfeit
the imitation of the autumn leaves

Hello is this your muse?
Well we’ve all seen her face before
It’s a lullaby that you plagiarized
And were not listening we wont listen anymore
Or is this your work of art?
A pretty canvas that you stole?
a lovely landscape that you replicate
And you try to pass it off as if its yours

Oh oh oh we sing a song
And you all wish that you could sing along
But that breaches the copyright
its not the artists intent to bail you out of jail tonight
And it’s a price that we all pay
To say we’re poets through and through the day
Oh we’re creative and we conceived
A masterpiece that we creatively deceived


Is this photograph you took something all your own
Or did you rip it off like you were some van gough,
It was in black and white but then you made it grey
im sure Picassos turning, turning over in his grave
and Are you classically complete
Or merely dancing to the staggered flamenco beat?
Yeah You found your groove
You found your jazz balet
in the trashcans that we kept
out in the alleyway

Song Stats
Hits: 1322
Comments: 6
Fans: 1
Plays: 48
Downloads: 56
Votes: 0
Uploaded: Mar 17, 2010 - 11:48:25 AM
Last Updated: Mar 17, 2010 - 11:48:25 AM Last Played: Jan 10, 2017 - 07:10:11 AM
Song License
Creative Commons License:
NoDerivs

Creative Commons

Song Actions
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Keywords:
not good (3)
Hardware:
mobilepre
MXL mics
Software:
macbook
Comments
dave_b said 2829 days ago (March 17th, 2010)
Rats
Good driving beat coupled with the dark melody is an interesting contrast. The acoustic is a nice flavor, I especially like the picked parts. Nice harmonies, good production.
Check out my latest song called Llarions Blues
Jim Bouchard said 2829 days ago (March 17th, 2010)
Okay, where to start?
So what do you want input on specifically? You seem to think it's the execution that is poor, but the parts you've executed here, the guitar playing, the drum arrangement, the singing, that's all very good. If I was looking to criticize it, this is what I think needs attention: The songwriting seems like it could be tighter. I get what you're saying but mostly because you say it exactly the same way throughout the whole song. It's a bit repetitive and by the end I felt like it was going on too long. It was like, "I got it, why are you lecturing me!" There's no twist at the end, nothing that the song turns on, nothing that changes the point of view to provide interest, lyrically. Maybe that's a tired old lyric convention, but I always enjoy a song more when there's a twist to it in the end, something I didn't expect that makes me really take notice.

Musically I think the songwriting is very good, it's got a nice melody and though it may not be the most earth-shatteringly innovative melody, it does seem original and catches my ear some.

As I said, the song is not actually as poorly executed as you indicate. The singing is pretty good, but I could have done without the autotune effect. Makes it a bit fireflies-like and random. I guess if the whole idea is lambasting people about originality or lack of it, it's sort of ironic. How original is irony though? The other thing is that it takes the most important part of the song and puts it at a distance.
The drumming is well done, it's energetic and expressive, but makes an odd combination sonically with the acoustic guitar by itself. It seems like there should be a bass to go along with it, and maybe some keyboards or distorted guitar or something to fill out the sound. Especially when the synthesized voice of the chorus comes in is this really evident. But the acoustic is well played and the arrangement of the acoustic part is very good. It just seems like it needs more support around it. It sounds like you spent a long time on the drum part, and you got a great take of the guitar and the drums and then you got tired of working on it. Or frustrated. That's easy to do when working by yourself on a song, because you lose perspective. It's good you put it up here for input and hopefully you'll keep working on it to make it better if you get some helpful suggestions. I enjoy your intensity and think you shouldn't get too down on yourself.
Check out my latest song called Big Yawn (Apogee One mic demo)
michaeljayklein said 2829 days ago (March 17th, 2010)
I liked it!
I don't analyze the living hell out of songs/recordings, but other than maybe being slightly too long, I thought this was a very good effort and it sounds like you put a lot of good work into it!
Check out my latest song called There Ain't Nobody Here but Us Chickens!
fasteddie said 2829 days ago (March 17th, 2010)
I searched
"not good" and this came up. That cracks me up!

Cool song. The only thing that I noticed is that the vocal tracks aren't consistent in volume at times. Not bad though.

Other than that I think it's a pretty jamming song.

Nice one.
Check out my latest song called On Borrowed Time
Six-Nail-Coffin said 2829 days ago (March 17th, 2010)
Feels rushed.
There is an odd cadence in there. Normally a like that sort of thing, but in this case i feel that it is resulting in a dissonance that you didn't intend. Try slowing down a bit, or speeding up enough to mirror the beats. Also I agree about the autotune, I dislike the effect in general and i don't feel that it adds to the composition. That said, I like the song and think that with a bit of polishing it could be a great song.
Check out my latest song called Krampus Carol
alackbass said 2756 days ago (May 29th, 2010)
I'm Sorry
This song is well written, well played, well sung, well produced, well arranged, and very well mixed.

The only thing that sucks is the song description!
Check out my latest song called Mean Miss Teacher
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