I think you have a really beautiful song in the works here.
You have a great voice and you sing this song with honest
emotion. Reminds me a little of George Michael in the
overall style. It really moved me.

Now for some technical notes:
1. The 12-string is a bit out of tune. (I have one and I
know what a bitch those things can be to tune)
2. The tremelo effect on the other guitar is just a bit too
strong for me. I'd ease it off some.
3. Spread those guitars out a little. They're not filling the
stereo space like I think they should.
4. I like the triangle but it's a little too loud, at least
compared to the rest of the percussion.
5. The song seems a rather long. Maybe if it were to
evelove and build more then that wouldn't be an issue.
Fill in the bottom with cellos, perhaps.

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this song was exactly what I needed tonight.
sadly beautiful. lyrics are perfect and they were sung
perfectly as well. I agree with pgreen - spread the guitars
out. You have lots of layers to work with. intro was a wee
bit long. also, after the first guitar break where you play
that nice melody on the 12 string you should go right
back into another verse. The mixing and editing and all
that stuff is always secondary to me. the hard part is
writing a great song and you've done that all ready!
Thanks!

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Well, I agree with pgreenstone's comments above. You have a really good song here, but the production is getting in the way!

My suggestions might be:
1) tune the 12string, add a super-wide chorus
2) ease off tremolo, compress and reverb that guitar!
3) try kicking that tremolo part to a higher octave at some position?
4) bring up the drums a touch and try to add more variety
5) the vocals just about right - maybe a slight dip in EQ somewhere in the 300-600Hz range?

Looking forward to the next version!

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Well well.... The first wow! goes to the vocal performance!
I really like the way you sing it. Guitars are good, and I
really like the tremolo effect. They make a grabber of a
texture for the song. Congratulations! I want to hear more
of your songs.

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woah. this song has some impact. i love the lead guitar,
but i think it could have less tremolo on it. the piano is
beautiful. the vocals are pretty much perfect!

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Your vocals are particularly poignant on this tune. Very
well sung!

I agree that spreading out the guitars and bringing down
the triangle might balance things better.

There are a lot of nice moments in this track. The overall
mix needs to be more consistent -- in other words, the
guitar tracks sound kinda dry while the piano has a lot of
reverb. You might want to match up the effects on your
tracks a bit more so the song has a more unified sound.

I like the chord progressions. However, you might want to
get to the chords in the contrasting section a bit sooner
(the part where you sing "And all that I know is what I feel
and all that I feel can't be revealed".) The first section is
kind of long. The whole song needs to be shortened a bit.

You created a contemplative, wistful atmosphere on this
track -- very nice.



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....looong

Is there a way to get some variety in it?

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Beautiful piano melody.
You have such a great voice Ian. You sing this song so
well.
I'm not too keen on the tremelo on the guitar either, but
other than that, nice production and arrangement.

More Please

Slimmie





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I would have liked the intro guitar to be a little louder, and
the lead to be a little less...what's the word...flangie?
warblie? I would have like to hear you play with the mix
quantity on the vocal reverb...if that makes a bit of sense,
I'm a little sleepy...there are parts where it seems over
done and parts that are perfect. Really pretty song
overall. I really liked the piano bit I don't know how, but it
seems to be coming from behind me which is really
interesting, being I only have the 2 speakers in front of
me. I
would love to know how you got it to do that. My biggest
complaint, that triangle, it made me want to throw things.

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clearly, this has taken a great deal of effort on your part.
these songs do. days and days of labor (of love). i can
only aspire to produce such a clean sound and your voice
sounds.. uh.. freaking awesome.

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This track is done wonderfully in many ways. The vocals
are gliding through the whole song, like butter. That
piano hook...fabulous, then those beautiful strings. The
tremolo guitar has a nice overall effect to the song and
wouldn't want it gone but I would not over use it
especially there towards the first verse where there isn't as
much instrumentation....just a thought.

If you do remix and do some more with it, let me know,
cause it's going on my IPod today. Great Job!



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Like other's said, the voice is real nice.
I like that piano theme alot.
With that beat having a bass would add something good
as well.

Thanks for posting.



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Incredibly nice vocals. I wish I had your voice. I really like
this style. I do agree with some of the comments on
technical stuff though. The out of tune 12 string is a real
no-no, the triangle is a little irritating, and the song could
use some editing as it's pretty long. Textures keep
changing throughout so it's not so bad. But there's so
much care and love put into this production, that your
effort has to be lauded only with these little reservations.

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