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Storm On Glass (first take/demo)


by

DWH

 Genre: Acoustic

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Description
Just wrote this and decided to post and see what you guys thought. If sounds alright then I might try to go through and record it proper...I literally spent ten-minutes on this. Took the picture with my Holga 135.
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Lyrics
She tries hard to trace time,
and keep herself from falling.

Fundamentalist beliefs,
keep her from seeing...

and it's hard to take a picture,
of all the ways she fails...

and the grace deep inside her,
how slowly it fades.

She wants to go home,
to see the start.

Where the misery inside her,
grew like moss on her heart.

The storm out the window,
beats the glass.

While she hopes in secret,
that it's strength won't last.


Song Stats
Hits: 1404
Comments: 10
Fans: 10
Plays: 49
Downloads: 62
Votes: 0
Uploaded: Jul 14, 2011 - 06:26:46 PM
Last Updated: Jul 14, 2011 - 06:26:46 PM Last Played: Dec 15, 2015 - 10:40:37 PM
Song License
Creative Commons License:
NonCommercial-ShareAlike

Creative Commons

Song Actions
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Hardware:
Vega Acoustic, Fender Jazz bass, Shure SM57, Macbook
Software:
Garageband
Comments
mowguy3 said 2116 days ago (July 14th, 2011)
Storm On Glass
Sounds good for just a quick thing. I think I know the intent with the lyric, maybe not, could be there is none. Your write, and it's cool. Vox delivery is perfect for the immage of the track and sound sweet. I would love to hear a better production with very few changes.. Nice work....
Check out my latest song called What Would That Make Me?
DWH said 2107 days ago (July 24th, 2011)
Thanks...
yeah I wanna redo this with a metronome and proper inputs so theres no fuzz.
Check out my latest song called WhatWhatWhat! v1.0
Vic Holman said 2116 days ago (July 14th, 2011)
storm
dark....... i like dark

this has a moody feel..... i like moody

of course you should develop this further
Check out my latest song called Blue Shoes
DWH said 2107 days ago (July 24th, 2011)
moody...
thanks for listening. I just checked out your Sailing track...sounds good. I'm really into sailing so I was a little biased from the start.
Check out my latest song called WhatWhatWhat! v1.0
MarkHolbrook said 2116 days ago (July 15th, 2011)
Cool
I think this deserves another go... Has some legs!
Check out my latest song called Corn Whiskey
J_Gretch said 2116 days ago (July 15th, 2011)
Storm On Glass
No doubt,,,some good ideas here.Hope you take it further.
Check out my latest song called All I'll ever Need
PeterB7858 said 2115 days ago (July 15th, 2011)
only needs a bit of work...
Hi Dave. Moody, atmospheric work that is different from a lot that is offered on MJ. Definitely work this up a bit more but not too much. It needs the stark, sparse arrangement. Perhaps some rain/thunder loops in the background to replace the hiss but retain the dark atmosphere. Take care, Peter.
Check out my latest song called Dancing In The Rain (GSB)
DWH said 2107 days ago (July 24th, 2011)
thunder,
yeah I like the idea of an atmospheric background. there was a storm outside during recording that you might have heard. I need a midi keyboard so I can add a proper arrangement.
Check out my latest song called WhatWhatWhat! v1.0
Elevator_Funk said 2113 days ago (July 17th, 2011)
....
David. The song sounds great thru headphones or small speakers. It sounds sparse and moody and spacey.

When hooked up to my nice speakers, it about blew my subwoofer speaker out, and the bass sounds out of tune, although when bass gets to the low registers, it tends to go out of tune anyways. I'd consider keeping it straight acoustic or fixing the bass.

The song in itself its pretty good though.
Check out my latest song called Dumb Funky
DWH said 2107 days ago (July 24th, 2011)
bass,
yeah your sub really kicks out the low ends...I'll try to tune it down when I get around to rerecording.
Check out my latest song called WhatWhatWhat! v1.0
Artist Info
artist photo
Name: David
Location: Billings Montana United States
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I have been playing guitar since I was 13 and have been recording since the summer of 2008. I like most styles of music and try to be a well rounded player. I am posting on Mac Jams because a friend of mine recommended it and I am interested in h... [see more]

Check out some of my other songs:

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