Much more punch in this one. As in previous, your lyrics
are the best part. You're doing kind of a shouted spoken
word thing rather than singing it so I still don't know for
sure how you'll sound if you kick back and belt it out. If
you're recording sitting down, stand up and put some
body English into it. Let it rip. Scare somebody!

One minor thing on the lyrics. The counting theme is
understood so you don't need to hit it so many times in
the body of the tune.

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what appeals to me most is how this song just does its
own thing. it's a little fun, a little mysterious. i agree with
alan on the repetition of the numbers-maybe you could
find a verse that rhymes to take its place on occasion, or
even count them differently. you seem to be almost
screaming at points & the notes hit a little too high-
maybe polish it a bit with the equalizer. the repetitive &
echoey vocals are a neat effect

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i think the counting is just fine. your songs are like
twisted, fun , off the cuff fairy tales. if you have a
keyboard you could add just a little light here and there.
like tinkerbells wand. i enjoy the direction you are going
and wouldnt mind working on a song together if i knew
how that was done


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You really turn on the power in this one. I love the way you experiment with repetitive lines, sometimes turning them into a chorus, sometimes a chant, sometimes a mantra, while often finding nuanced meanings by altering a word or syllable emphasis.

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very interesting

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