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Said the Rose


by

kipak

 Genre: Pop (Alternative)
No artwork

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Description
This is the 3rd iteration of a very old song and hopefully the final. Started off as mostly a piano piece but Ive dropped all the keyboard tracks with the exception of some soft synth near the end. Ive always thought of this as more of a guitar song but really never felt I could get the right edge on the guitar riffs because of the simple melody. Ive changed some of the major chords to maj7s etc to give a bit more variation. Ive always liked the lyrics but its been a challenge to give some weight to the vocals as the lyrics and melody a bit sugary. Ive opted for kind of whispery vocal rather than a straight forward one to help with this. Its a bit of a gamble with so much effects on the vocals and I think it adds to the flavor but I have a bad habit of adding too much reverb to my vocals so its difficult to tell myself if it works here or I am just falling back into bad mixing habits. Lyrics are from my brother C.Pak...circa 1985.

Look forward to hearing some feedback before attempting a final mix.
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Lyrics
Said the rose to the sun in the sky
I am but one of many before you
I am just another creature alive
Trying to keep from falling

Said the sun in the sky in reply
There have been other flowers before you
But none of them ever looked to the sky
None of them ever followed

(chorus)
Dont you understand
I need you to survive
If you might go away
Id wither up and die
So dont worry baby
Ill neverlet you cry
said the sun in reply
In reply

(verse 2)
Said the sun in the sky to the rose
I am but one of many above you
I am just another star in the sky
trying to keep from falling

(Chorus)
Song Stats
Hits: 1798
Comments: 7
Fans: 4
Plays: 130
Downloads: 0
Votes: 0
Uploaded: Mar 14, 2010 - 12:33:02 PM
Last Updated: Mar 14, 2010 - 12:33:02 PM Last Played: Apr 07, 2019 - 10:50:19 AM
Song License
Creative Commons License:
Attribution-NoDerivs-NonCommercial

Creative Commons

Song Actions
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Hardware:
Same as always
Software:
Logic 9
Comments
Hickling_Stan said 3445 days ago (March 15th, 2010)
Interesting
You've obviously put a lot of thought into this arrangement and for the most part I think it pays off. Definatly need to pull back on the reverb on the vocals though IMHO. Not entirely but signifficantly. Good song though. Vaguely Prefab Sprout in feel. Cheers Mark Oh and thanks for your comment on the major keys on my latest thats really food for thought.on
Check out my latest song called Kings Cross 74 with DWL
kipak said 3445 days ago (March 15th, 2010)
Thanks
Have to look up prefab sprout. This is the great thing about the board..exactly what I needed to hear on the reverb. Will be listening to your other stuff in the future. Alot of talent on the site these days!
Check out my latest song called Into the wind
CDragon said 3445 days ago (March 15th, 2010)
kipak
Not that I know much, but your right, to much reverb on the vocals. I have not started on vocals on my songs don't know if I will. Remember take my comment as ideas, I would, add harmonies to the voice, or different octaves, reduce the reverb on your vocal until you can just barley hear it, the melody of the song itself is fine in my opinion, I feel your vocals you should be the front and center. Even if you change nothing but the vocal reverb it is a nice song.
Check out my latest song called Gina
kipak said 3445 days ago (March 15th, 2010)
Good ideas
Thanks and I have taken your advice. Ive payed around with the EQ and I can get the edgy feel that way instead of hiding behind the verb. The suggestion on octaves is a good idea.
Check out my latest song called Into the wind
Vic Holman said 3444 days ago (March 15th, 2010)
3rd times the charm
it's been a while since i heard the older posts. but this sounds great. such an excellent tune!

now, you have such a great voice, i think the heavy reverb masks it a bit to much i would cut it back a little, but not totally
Check out my latest song called Life In A Car
ste said 3411 days ago (April 18th, 2010)
nice
tune. i like the fx on the vox. i'm jealous cos my tunes never sound too good when i switch em up loud - but this sounds great
Check out my latest song called songbreak
Char said 3358 days ago (June 10th, 2010)
You have
a great voice that doesn't need that much boosting. Good luck with this. :)
Check out my latest song called Bound, v2. w Music by Dirigent
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